Wordless Wednesday

13 Weeks

Here is what's happening this week:

Baby is forming vocal cords this week and all 20 teeth are formed, even though he/she won't get to use them for quite some time. Your baby weighs approximately 1 ounce and the placenta weighs about an ounce now as well.

The baby's intestines are moving from the umbilical cord up into the abdomen. Villi are forming inside the intestines, these help in peristaltic movement and digestion. The pancreas of your little one is now secreting insulin and meconium, your baby's first stool is developing.

Your baby's head is becoming more proportional to his/her body and is now one third the size of their body. Your baby is about the size of a peach.

Anxiety & Technical Difficulties

I've been troubled with a lot of anxiety so far during this pregnancy. I normally suffer from anxiety and I used to be on medication for it, but one of the side effects is weight gain. And that is exactly what happened to me - I wound up gaining about 80 pounds in one short year! One year! So, with the help of my Dr. I weaned myself off of it and have been working hard to control my anxiety on my own. Thankfully, I have had a LOT of success with it and very rarely have anxious episodes. When I do, I can normally calm down with a small glass of wine or talking with some girlfriends or going for a walk - which makes me feel a lot better than taking some medicine (and gaining tons of weight).

Anyhow, now that I'm pregnant - the anxiety is back and rearing it's ugly head! I figured that I would have some anxious moments after suffering two miscarriages last year - it's only normal to have some worries after going through that, but this - I wasn't expecting.

I feel overwhelming anxiety - almost dibilitating some days. I wake up some days, and can't stop crying. Other nights, I don't go to sleep at all. I can't turn my mind off and the horrible thoughts and worry that comes with it. I worry about anything and everything. What if we're not ready for a baby? What if we can't afford a child? What if I'm not a good mom? What if something is wrong with the baby and I can't tell? What if I lose this baby too? And on and on and on!

D and I talk A LOT - he is SO supportive. He is reassuring and helps me relax and I am so, so lucky to have married such a wonderful man. He doesn't make me feel crazy - he just helps me get through my rough patches and look forward to better and brighter days.

When I was in the midst of a total panic attack a couple of weeks ago, D suggested that we get one of the doppler monitors so that we can try to hear the baby's heartbeat at home. He thought since our ultrasounds are going to be more spread out now and since I can't yet feel the baby - being able to hear him/her would make me feel better.

Oh - he's such a smart (and sweet) man! I looked online and found a place that will rent them out. I ordered a machine and it arrived on Thursday. Immediately, we took it out of the box and headed to our bedroom so I could lay down and we could try to hear the baby's heartbeat.

It took about 10 minutes, but we were able to find the baby. He/she was on the complete opposite side than he/she was just a few days earlier at our Drs appointment. We got a monitor that allows you to record the heartbeat and couldn't wait to share it with everyone. That's when we started having technical difficulties!

I couldn't load the file to YouTube because it's not a video file. Then I had the same problem with blogger. Then the same problem with Facebook. Then, I started googling what to do. After two nights of looking this up, I finally found a page that suggested that I download a file converter, convert the file to an mp3 and then use a (free) online file hosting site to upload the video. The site would give me a url that I could use on my blog and so you could click on it and then listen to the baby's heartbeat. Only, it wasn't that easy at all.

After an hour, I finally got my file converted. Then onto the file sharing. I went through two google search pages of links to file sharing locations. After joining pretty much every one of them, I FINALLY found one that would upload the file. But I had to sign up for a free week trial and then $5 monthly subscription after that.

Uuh! I got my url but it wouldn't come up on my blog correctly. It just kept taking me to the file hosting website. Which, surprisingly (not) gives them a lot of advertisement but doesn't get me anywhere. After another day of jacking with that - I gave up. Then, I started contacting paypal to try to cancel my subscription (which was surprisingly easy).

Little did I know just sharing one file would prove to be so difficult (and frustrating). Good thing I have no life, or all that time spent trying to figure this out would have really put a damper in it!

So, friends (and family) - you'll just have to take my word for it. We have a file of the baby's heartbeat that has got to be the sweetest sound I have ever heard in my life. I'm sure that sound will be replaced with giggles, squeals, and cries soon enough but for now - we are loving it and still trying to get over our technical difficulties!

Newest Ultrasound Pic

We had a Dr. appointment Monday afternoon with a new Dr. I was released from the specialist a couple of weeks ago (they only monitor you until 10 weeks), so it was time to find a regular OB/Gyn. Dr. Russell was recommended to me, by my specialist and D and I were very, very pleased with him.

He is very friendly, although soft spoken. He was polite and considerate and took time to explain and lot of things and answer all of the questions that we had. He made a point to tell us that every time we come into his office, we'll be meeting with him - not a PA or a Nurse Practitioner. Which, I like very much. I want to actually know my Dr before he shows up to deliver my baby!

He told us that it was not typical to do more than 3 ultrasounds during a pregnancy, and since I just had one two weeks ago, they wouldn't be performing one that day. And then the tears started. I just couldn't help it - I've just had a lot of anxiety and I don't like not getting to see and/or hear the baby every week. With my history, it makes me nervous. So, they squeezed me in for an ultrasound and told me that even though we wouldn't do ultrasounds every appointment, they would always check the baby's heartbeat - so I would get some kind of reassurance to make me feel better.

After I finished with him, I went across the hall to meet the lovely ladies in the Ultrasound department.

Of course, I can never see the heartbeat (and D and the ultrasound people ALWAYS can). I'm not sure if its the way that I'm laying or just my anxiety but they always have to take some extra time to point it out to me, so I can feel better.

We were in the room for quite awhile, because the munchkin wouldn't be still so that we could get his/her heart rate and a picture.

This is the best picture we could get:

This is one busy little baby! We were able to see the baby do a few front flips and kick his/her legs and wave his/her arms. This is one active little person (which makes me really nervous about what I have in store for me when he/she arrives).

We (finally) got the heart rate and it was 171, so still fast and strong.

Isn't it amazing how much this little person has grown in the last couple of months? I love seeing how he/she changes and will surely miss all of those ultrasounds!

We go back at the end of March for our next check up and to listen to the baby's heart beat and then it will just be a couple more weeks after that, that we'll get to find out what we're having!

Outfitted

I just adore baby and children's holiday outfits. I don't care what holiday - I just think they are all so adorable. I cannot wait to dress our child up for each and every holiday. Recently, I discovered Diapers.com and they have all kinds of adorable children's clothing, and now that the main holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas) are over they are all on sale! I mean, really, really good sale! So, I went ahead and picked up a few things!

If baby Fountain is a girl - I can totally see all of the adorable bows to go with some of these outfits.

I just adore these Sleep and Play outfits. I'll probably use them just for ps, but they are so soft and cute - I might use them for outfits and pjs!

These have the little turkey from the front, on the butt of the pants. Too cute for words!

I can't wait to put a clean, chubby little baby in these pjs!

I don't know for sure - but I bet this is pretty accurate!

A little one waiting for Santa in these pajamas will be so sweet! Aren't these little outfits adorable? I can't wait to put our sweet little munchkin in them!

Wordless Wednesday

12 Weeks

Today, I'm 12 weeks pregnant! Our little munchkin is now the size of a plum!

Here's what's happening this week:

The most dramatic development this week are the baby's reflexes. Soon, his/her fingers will be able to open and close, their toes will curl, eye muscles will clench and his/her mouth will be able to make sucking movements. If fact, if you prod your abdomen, your baby will squirm in response, although you won't be able to feel it.

His/her intestines have grown so fast that they protrude into the umbilical cord but will start to move into the abdominal cavity about now and his/her kidneys will start to excrete urine into his/her bladder.

Isn't it amazing how much happens in such a short amount of time? I can't wait to read about what's going to happen next week! We had a Drs appointment yesterday, and everything went well. I'll post the ultrasound picture later this week.